Saturday, July 28, 2012

Maybe it's time to go to bed

In the last 30 minutes I have put ear drops in my eye (OW!), worn two different flip flops to the pet store, and referred to a cool skull-shaped bottle as "a skeleton head." It's totally time to call it a day, but instead I'm going to go dye my hair. Anyone want to place bets on how this is going to go?


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Monday, July 23, 2012

I wouldn't drink that if I were you....

Once again, it was time for me to leave a urine sample in my urologist's office as part of the instillation process. Instillations are a fun part of having interstitial cystitis, since this treatment is a medicine that is instilled in the bladder through a catheter. Catheters are super fun and exciting instruments of torture. Wohoo!

This time I was lacking some creativity on what to write on the outside of my urine specimen cup. If you are a long-time reader of this blog, you'll remember that I like to write a bit of whimsy on the outside of each cup, just because. This was fun at first but then the nurse admitted that sometimes when she has a crummy day, she actually looks forward to handling my pee just because of the little statement on the cup. Pressure!

So, I resorted to asking for ideas on facebook. I got several, but the winning idea came from Scott Lovelis. He suggested getting a Mott's apple juice sticker for the cup. Now, I didn't have one of those hanging around but I did have a bunch of Mott's juice boxes and the cardboard thingo that goes inside the shrink-wrapped container of boxes. So I got out my scissors and packed the cut-out and some tape in my purse. And I giggled a little.

This idea only worked because I’m in pretty good shape, pain-wise, nowadays and I don’t have to use bladder pain meds very often. The pain meds make urine either fire red or an odd toilet-bowl-cleaner blue. Neither would be likened to apple juice.
I went into the bathroom to execute my plan. I decorated the cup, took the picture, and then realized I could never pee in it and not bump/knock off/mess up the Mott’s sign. So I had to employ a second cup and then poured the pee in the creative cup VERY CAREFULLY. I am very committed to this gag, clearly.

The nurse loved it, of course! She complimented me on my creativity. I had to admit I’d gotten the idea from someone on facebook. I’m pretty sure she still thinks I’m awesome.

To add to today’s fun, my regular nurse was training a new nurse. This nurse had never done a catherization before (and she still hasn’t; today she was just watching, thankfully) and so my regular nurse had to give a step-by-step lecture on the whole thing. “You see this? This is the urethra.” Wonderful.

Life. It just doesn’t get much better than this!




The "or not" part was all me. 

For more posts about Interstitial Cystitis, including all my crazy urine cups, click here. 

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Saturday, July 21, 2012

The Banana Song

My daughter has suggested that this (very excellent) Marina and the Diamonds' song be renamed "The Banana Song." Can you guess why?

Also, Marina is hella cute, and her lyrics are smart, funny, and ironic too. That is all.
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Friday, July 13, 2012

Yay! I'm! So! Excited!


OK! I would LOVE to put my items in this basket! What an great idea!

Librarians must be easily excited. Or, at least, easily excited by the idea that library patrons might put their returned stuff in its place rather than leaving it all the hell over the library. 

Remind me to never be a librarian. That ish is hard work.


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Thursday, July 5, 2012

Good one!

Yesterday, like every day this summer, I was arguing with The Boy about wearing sunscreen. He's got some sensory issues and hates the application of sunscreen, particularly to his face, neck, and ears. Recently I got sunburned myself because I was busy applying the kids' lotion and then I sent them off to the pool and haphazardly sprayed my own back. I had stripes of non-burned skin where the spray had saturated surrounded by red areas. As a twitter friend of mine, @revfridge, said, sunscreen is SO literal.

Anyway, since my children have never really been sunburned, I used my artistically striped back as a lesson, showing them what it looks like to be burned and describing that it hurt. So, when the latest go-round of "Why do I have to wear sunscreen" started, I told my little 8-year-old darling, "You should see my back; it’s still in pain." And he replied:

"You should see my butt, because you’re a pain in it."

Husband and I were stunned silent for a moment, and then I said:

"I gotta say, that was one of your better ones."

And then Husband went back to applying The Boy's sunscreen.

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